the kiss-off

Over the past couple of years, I have noticed an alarming trend in my dates.  I'll call it the kiss-off.  I will admit to three times at least in the last couple of years that this has happened to me... on a first or second date, he returns me to public transit so that I can make my way back home (such is the life of urban dating), plants a very surprising kiss on me, and then disappears.

The first time it happened was with Bike-Co.  We'd corresponded on J-Date.  He had that geek-chic thing working for him.  We met for a drink at a bar that I randomly suggested, and is one of his favorites.  One beer in,and we both seem smitten.  We make our way to dinner, and I've lost track of time and place.  This is one of those first dates.  But we both have to work the next day, and it's still only a first date...  So he walks me to the train, and kisses me passionately.  It took me off guard, and I know I had one drink too many for it to be a perfect first kiss, but my knees melted anyway.  But that was the last I heard from him. Ever.

Kiss-off #2 was slightly different...  I'll call him Smirksalot.  He's one of those guys that doesn't really have a full smile - even in the broadest of happy expressions he somehow seems to be smirking, but it's sexy and it works on him.  I'd run across him, I kind of knew who he was, and I conjured an introduction at a happy hour one night.  The intro was all I needed, he seemed interested from the get go.  We talked about all kinds of things, he was fascinating, intelligent, engaging...  and yummy. He asked that night if I'd go out with him sometime, and then (miracle of miracles) actually called the next day and made a date.  We went to dinner, then a post-dinner drink, and then he made a move.  It was a romantic, passionate move, and I'm a sucker for passionate.  Plus add to the recipe that I was smitten, clearly gullible, but smart enough not to let it go too far.  An hour later (after many more kisses and moments), he took me to my train to get home.  And never called again.  (Though he's still a friend on facebook... odd that.)

Hopefully, I'm going to learn my lesson on this... but there's at least a #3 story.  We connected through eHarmony of all things, but realized before we met in person that we actually knew each other professionally.  He will be known as Cap, as he is always wearing a baseball cap.  I'm convinced he probably wears it during sex, something about always being cold....  But that seems unimportant now, right?  Cap and I met for a first date at the bar of a very fancy restaurant.  At first I was a little uncomfortable, but that quickly faded and it turned out we had a lot to talk about and so much in common.  I really enjoyed talking to him.  The second date was equally great - a nice glass of wine, missing the first showing of the movie because we were distracted and lost track of time.  But we grabbed a quick bite, made it to the 2nd showing.  Then he walked me to my train, and totally caught me off guard with the kiss.  I'll confess on this one, it was not my best showing.  I felt for Cap.  But it wouldn't have mattered.  It was the Kiss-Off.

Someday, someone will explain the Kiss-Off to me.