G.I. Jew

As I debated about writing back to Newfie, I remember one of my favorite jdate experiences... a man we call G.I. Jew.

G.I. Jew bragged on his profile about his military experience, as if he was full-time military.  On our first date, I realized that he was a reservist, had never been called to active.  I had friends in the reserves at the time - they spend a lot of time talking about their day jobs, and some time talking about their commitment to the military.  They talked about its influence on their daily lives, but it was not the dominating thing.  I even had one friend who got called into active duty... even he talked about it less than G.I. Jew.

G.I. Jew picked me up on our first date in his oversize S.U.V.  Even with my car-less-ness, I couldn't carbon off-set that.  He was nice enough, and I thought maybe just maybe I'm being to shallow, too harsh.

On our second date, he pulled the 2nd-date-desperation-flowers maneuver.  He showed up with a bouquet of a dozen white roses, and explained that it was a bribe so I would go out with him again.  He explained this at the beginning of our second date. Did he know something was going to go wrong?  

While I'm usually kind to my dates, anytime I'm not sure or think I'm ready to dismiss someone without really giving them a chance, I introduce them to my friends.  While on occasion, they have called me on my BS, they have also helped me avert some disasters. 

This night, we joined some friends to see a movie and grab a bite to eat.  While hunting for parking, my friend C pulled up in her super-cute, super-fuel-efficient VW Golf alongside G.I. Jew's mondo SUV.  She barely choked her laughter down at me climbing out of the beast.  G.I. Jew had joined me at an evening of some of my wittiest, sharpest-tongued, quick-witted friends.

Poor G.I. Jew was like a spectator at mid-court during a tennis match.  I thought he was going to get whiplash.  Even before the date was over, I think he knew it was over.